If life was a Diner

This blog may contain graphic nature and reader discretion is advised:

I am certain I am aging myself right about now,(or maybe my parents just bought the aftermarket complete season set, well after my birth) but do you remember the TV Show “Mel’s Diner”?

With Flo, the sassy red beehived hair gawky woman with the attitude? Then you had Alice, the single mom that did everything right and held everyone together and of course the one chick I cant think of her name, but was afraid of everything? Remember that one? Oh and of COURSE there was Mel - the Dadish figure that tried to be a hard ass but was nothing less than a sweaty greasy super nice fella that was very protective and always did the right thing in the end. OK, so THAT’S Mel’s Diner in a nut shell.(like today’s diners minus the sex, scandal and decieit)

So IF………

So IF life was like a Diner this is how it would roll.(or rather rolls)

She pulls her pencil from her ear, shifts her hips and cocks her head to one side while looking at the ceiling, “ARE YOU READY TO ORDER?”. Gum snapping and the shine on her forhead tells you she means business.

This is LIFE’S DINER? You kiddin me?!?!?!

I been ready to order from here my WHOLE life.(I rub my hands together and patter my feet under the table in anticipation)

For the children I would like two all you can eat life buffets with your side salad of wisdom - go easy on the embarassment please. It will be all they can ever possibly eat with minimal indigestion.

I will take three soup de jour’s. I understand you are serving that famous one, the “Do Over” soup, only served in politics and Hollywood. Mmmm I can taste the hearty goodness! Warms my confidence.

My youngest son would like a glass of Lotto, with no ice to keep his heart from chilling with his new money. And if it wouldn’t be TOO much to ask could you squeeze a lemon zest in it so he knows how to detect bitterness? Thank you.

My oldest would prefer a very hot steamy cup of jet black “can’t see the whole world” brand coffee. This way he can sip it, a little at a time and sweeten it to his desire. Please offer him a LARGE spoon for sugar so he can add his own world sweetness as he sees fit. It will be a perfect blend.

For myself, I would love a sautéed stuffed love heart. That’s sounds DELISH!!!!! Should I choose to sample some stuffing there is always more room for the “good stuff” and the sautee will certainly keep it tender. Whatever you do, don’t burn it. Just ruins the taste! BLAIK! ICKA!

And for my drink? I would love a room temp glass of whatever “trust red” you have to offer. I am certain you can choose it and will enhance my heart entrée allowing the flavors to dance! Go ahead, you choose it.

And lastly, for dessert, I think we will all agree on ONE plate of Greedless Homemade Pie! You can’t make that in a factory! 3 small spoons please, we want to savour every taste and fill out bellies with peace.

After a glorious meal ,the bill comes.

With the grand total shocking us all that reads:
Pay with Love and Compassion
We Don’t Accept Contempt
Gratuities in the form of THANK YOU only

WHAT A MEAL!

So IF life was like a diner, I would watch Flo’s awkward gait from table to table and listen to Alice’s banter of morals and truth. Mel would protect us and serve ANYTHING our heart desired. And the scared chick, who’s name I can STILL not recall would remain scared and skiddish and likely never ATE at the this diner.

It’s fun to think about.

ANYTHING on the menu.
Bellied up.
Heart on your sleeve and
An empty cup…………

She pulls her pencil from her ear, shifts her hips and cocks her head to one side while looking at the ceiling - “ARE YOU READY TO ORDER?”

The menu is yours!
Order up!
Or would you miss the meal in the famous LIFE’S DINER and exclaim,
“KISS MY GRITS!”


(Oh, I just noticed my disclaimer at the beginning, the "graphic nature" - I meant that for another blog I am working on.......writers marketing ploy)